Your boss says he has to lay some employees off so beware, your doctor calls and tell you to call him right back, your daughter calls from jail...you get the idea; bad news can come in many ways and at any time it's all in how you deal with that news that matters.
When you get bad news you're going to feel that the world is spinning out of control, you won't quite understand how "this" could have happened or what the meaning of it is. For some people their imagination might get the best of them, filling in all the unknowns by finding worst-case scenarios and dramatizing them to the point of mental and physical exhaustion. Others will start to blame themselves revisiting the news over and over again until they can become the new "normal". In the immediate aftermath of bad news, the anxiety, blame, and fear can feel destabilizing but it's important to remember that your bodies immediate response is only there as a warning for you to be on guard- a self protection. Flight or fight is a common response to where your mind and body are mobilizing to protect you and the intensity of your initial response will subside; for some people in a matter of hours, others days or weeks, it typically depends on the bad news and the created emotional trauma because of such events.
So when it come to "bad news" it never comes the same way or at the same time for any of us but believe it or not the universal body for most people will react the same way- flight or fight. To want to runaway or be in denial is a very natural response, just as to be heightened in your senses to the point of wanting to fight your way through the situation to make the "bad news" just disappear. Doctor Randal Mclock has worked with hundreds of men and women who have dealt with serious diagnoses, especially cancer, and he has found that his patients albeit scared, angry, and frustrated, (not in that order) when first hearing the bad news typically will let the emotions ride there course but always after a few days he receives the message they are ready to fight the disease. "People want to live, and they want to be in control, fighting back helps them accomplish this," Mclock says.
The key to bad news- any bad news, slow down, allow your mind and body to process the information, and DO NOT make any big decisions. It is natural to feel impatient when you get bad news, just like the cancer patient ready to fight back, however if you don't have all the facts yet you jump right into the fight it can lead you to hasty and potentially unwise decisions about how to move forward.
Support from loved ones and friends can be an excellent way to over come bad news but with that said be choosey for whom to confide in; you don't want to tell a best friend is going to cry on your shoulder for hours on end feeling sorry for you, just as you would not like a partner telling you to "buck it up, get over it". Choose your source of support from someone who can give you perspective, empathy, and balance because any other kind of support is really all that helpful, more like baggage or someone who could increase your fear and anxiety. If friends or family are not in your line of choice a trusted health professional is always a safe place to turn to instead. The key is to slow down and listen, take notice of your life and how you want to proceed; this isn't the time to race forward or make big decisions. Be gentle with yourself.
When you get bad news you're going to feel that the world is spinning out of control, you won't quite understand how "this" could have happened or what the meaning of it is. For some people their imagination might get the best of them, filling in all the unknowns by finding worst-case scenarios and dramatizing them to the point of mental and physical exhaustion. Others will start to blame themselves revisiting the news over and over again until they can become the new "normal". In the immediate aftermath of bad news, the anxiety, blame, and fear can feel destabilizing but it's important to remember that your bodies immediate response is only there as a warning for you to be on guard- a self protection. Flight or fight is a common response to where your mind and body are mobilizing to protect you and the intensity of your initial response will subside; for some people in a matter of hours, others days or weeks, it typically depends on the bad news and the created emotional trauma because of such events.
So when it come to "bad news" it never comes the same way or at the same time for any of us but believe it or not the universal body for most people will react the same way- flight or fight. To want to runaway or be in denial is a very natural response, just as to be heightened in your senses to the point of wanting to fight your way through the situation to make the "bad news" just disappear. Doctor Randal Mclock has worked with hundreds of men and women who have dealt with serious diagnoses, especially cancer, and he has found that his patients albeit scared, angry, and frustrated, (not in that order) when first hearing the bad news typically will let the emotions ride there course but always after a few days he receives the message they are ready to fight the disease. "People want to live, and they want to be in control, fighting back helps them accomplish this," Mclock says.
The key to bad news- any bad news, slow down, allow your mind and body to process the information, and DO NOT make any big decisions. It is natural to feel impatient when you get bad news, just like the cancer patient ready to fight back, however if you don't have all the facts yet you jump right into the fight it can lead you to hasty and potentially unwise decisions about how to move forward.
Support from loved ones and friends can be an excellent way to over come bad news but with that said be choosey for whom to confide in; you don't want to tell a best friend is going to cry on your shoulder for hours on end feeling sorry for you, just as you would not like a partner telling you to "buck it up, get over it". Choose your source of support from someone who can give you perspective, empathy, and balance because any other kind of support is really all that helpful, more like baggage or someone who could increase your fear and anxiety. If friends or family are not in your line of choice a trusted health professional is always a safe place to turn to instead. The key is to slow down and listen, take notice of your life and how you want to proceed; this isn't the time to race forward or make big decisions. Be gentle with yourself.
About the Author:
Altegra Health offers free social and public programs to help you get in shape mind and body.
Posts
0 comments
Post a Comment